What do you see when you look in the mirror?

I have always been, what society would consider, overweight.  I have struggled with my weight my entire life.  To be honest, I wish I was as fat now as I thought I was in highschool!! haha  Looking back at pictures from that time in my life, I was not as big as I thought I was.  And honestly, if I had just grown another 6 inches, I would be perfect... according to society...

This all started when my parents and I were in Sam's club the other day, and my mum picked up a tub of Ginger snaps... yep,, cookies,, Memories of me or Todd calling my Dad on Christmas Eve, so Levi could talk to "Santa",, well Santa told Levi he loved ginger snaps,,, from that point on that was all we could leave out for him on Christmas eve,, Ginger snaps,.... so there I am in Sam's club, tears streaming down my face and laughing at the obserdity of it all and the joy that memory brought..  then,  I was driving around Salt Lake with my Mum the other day, after work, and we started talking about Todd and Levi,, well I started talking,, and I said to her,, I just want to have a pity party for a minute.  The tears flowed as I cried to her, How much does one person have to take?  All I want is to be with my boys again... Kenz is getting married, Jake is married,, and here I sit... I dont want to be the strong one any more.. I don't want to do this any more. I.  Am.  Done!
I went on for a few more minutes and just let the tears falls,, it's been a bit since I have let the water works release from the flood gates, so it was probably needed.

And this thought has been haunting my brain ever since.... "What do you see when you look in the mirror?  Do you see what I see?"  Now this could be taken two ways,.,, one,, Our Heavenly Father asking US what do we see when we look in the mirror, and two,, us asking our friends, family and acquaintances,, what to they see when they look at us,, or themselves in the mirror,, do we see what others see?

Here is what I see when I look in the mirror,

• I see a little girl with rags in her hair because her hair holds curl amazingly well and she loves the way it bounces when it's curly.
• I see an adolescent going to school and struggling to make friends, never quite fitting in, but never really alone either.
• I see a teenager entering highschool, studying hard for every single C she got.
• I see a 20 yr old eagerly anticipating the birth of her first child, scared at the concept of being responsible for another human being.
• I see a young lady, rising out of the ashs of abusive relationships, and coming to the realization that what other's think, doesn't really matter.  All that truly matters is that she is true to herself, and is the best Mum she can be for her children.
• I see a lady, strong in her faith, raising her daughter and son to be true to themselves, to stay close to the spirit.
• I see a lady struggling to make ends meet, and not let it affect her children
• I see a woman, who learned to trust again, and allows a man to love her as she deserves to be loved, and allows this man to love her kids and raise them as his own.  
• I see a woman, strong, weak, happy, sad, part of her is missing, yet her desire to go on and continue to smile is greater than her desire to give up, and be done.  
• I see a woman who is beautiful, not necessarily according to society's standards, but more to those that know her, those who have seen her at her worst, cheered her on, and loved her through it all, who have helped her get up time and time again, who have seen her smile when her whole entire world is crumbling around her...

What do you see when you look in the mirror?  Do you see the awesomeness that is you? Do you see how your hand has affected so many people, for the better of man kind? Do you see the love people have for you?

Go,, look in the mirror,, and see if you can see what I see..

Love.