Organ donation

It wasn't his heart. It wasn't his lungs, or liver, it wasn't a limb or skin, or some other life altering organ... but it was,, for one girl and her family it was very life altering.., And it was his eye.  I remember getting the phone call, someone on the other end,, offering condolences, asking if I had thought about organ donation, is it something I would be interested in... that's one job I would not want.... calling up a family member who had just lost someone they loved, and asking if they would let us cut them up and take out what was needed by another person.  Heart wrenching to say the least.

I never even thought twice about it. YES! YES YES YES YES YES!.. if it could help someone then please,, take what you need, was my response,  My heart physically hurt when I was told all they could take was Levi's cornea and parts of his heart.  Healthy, vibrant, young 11 yr old boy has died, and because he didn't die in a hospital all they could take was those little insignificant things.  Well they aren't so significant if you need them and yours don't work!!


In August of this year I got another call from the Utah Lions Eye Bank,, maybe it was an email, telling me they were redoing the pamphlet that they give to recipients and donors, and would I mind if they used our (my and Maddy's) story.  Absolutely!! Anything to keep part of him here,, alive.  So I sent her a picture that was taken just maybe a week before the accident.  One that captures all of that sweet, funny, dorky, lovable young man I was blessed to have call me Mum!!

The lady emailed me yesterday a copy of the new pamphlet they will be handing out to Donor families and recipient families.  I didn't open it until I got home, well to Tom's last night,,, I knew I would cry, and I knew I didn't want to be alone when I saw it for the first time.

I love it...

https://cdn.fbsbx.com/v/t59.2708-21/14736981_10154502735905638_4691851845000232960_n.pdf/Writing-to-Donor-f.pdf?oh=da2646d2b28f19feb72a5942e79ea1b8&oe=5815126E&dl=1

That's a bigger picture and you can read what they printed. Below is a screenshot of the pamphlet. 💜

Someone once told me,, 'Levi is gone, he isn't here, he isn't living in the recipient...'

All I can think is He is here still... part of his dna,, part of what I helped create, is helping a very sweet young lady have a most adventurous life, helping others, doing what she can to make the world a better place for all she comes in contact with... I know she has made my world just a little better by being true to herself and loving and remembering my son on a daily basis *her words,, not mine*  She and her family are now family to me, always will be.  We may not see each other much, at all, but we love each other, we watch from a distance how one another are doing, and we reach out when needed.

Thank you,, thank you to the Utah Lions Eye Bank for keeping Levi's memory going.. for the compassion and love you have shown to our family.  And thank you to my sweet girl Maddy, for reaching out to me to show love, and gratitude for something that could have just as easily been tossed in the garbage,, for allowing me to see that it has just as big of an impact on your life as a limb, a lung, a kidney.. *maybe not a heart because well that's a pretty intense organ ;-)*

Blessings from Heaven

Canadian Thanksgiving,,, the ORIGINAL THANKSGIVING!  yes it's true,, October was the original thanksgiving, for both USA and Canada, Until Abe Lincoln set it to the 4th Thursday of November during the civil war.  :-) So, since I married an american we have celebrated both every single year for the last 14 years!!  It has become an incredible tradition that we, as a family, love doing with our friends for Canadian and our Family for American thanksgiving! It also happens to fall relatively close to Todd's birthday so we have just always combined the two.

And we did it again this year! We do it on the Saturday before, so that Kenz, Jeff, Jake and Emily can come up and still get home at a decent time on Sunday.  It was a fantastic time with great food, even better friends and family around us all!!

Kenz came up Friday and we spent some much needed time together just her and I friday night,, ,then we took Willow, my cute grand puppy, over to Tom's so his dog Toby, and Willow could play together,, it was hilarious to watch these two dogs interact and play!  They are both relatively CLOSE to the same size, Willow is a walker coon hound, and Toby is a black lab,, so they could both play hard with each other!

Then Jake and Emily came up Saturday, and we ate with some of our friends that we call family, and visited, then Kenz headed home and Jake and Emily stayed until Sunday.

Sunday, we got the opportunity to go to my best friend's granddaughter's baby blessing!  Oh what a precious little girl!! I motioned to my niece (they have called me aunt for 14 years) that I wanted to hold this little girl, and she passed her down,, she started fussing and I am whispering to her,, "shhh shhh, shh, it's ok, where did you just come from,, who do you see?" and she stops crying and looks over my left shoulder...  looked at me and gave me the BIGGEST GRIN,, (remember when my inseparable sister had her baby and I asked her the same thing,, and she looked over my same shoulder and smiled????)  yep,, tears,, just started falling,, right as her Nana, my bf, looked over and heard and saw what was going on,, I looked at my bf and just smiled through the tears.  This precious little baby kept glancing over my shoulder, looking at me and smiling,, don't tell me the veil isn't thin.

Right as this is going on, the aaronic priesthood is getting ready to pass the sacrament, and I look up and see a young man, around the same age as Levi with the same stinkin' floppy hair. Oh my heart!!  Emily and Jake notice too, and we all did a double take.

Sacrament is over and it's testimony meeting,,, I struggle with the first sunday of every month, have for a while now,, but guess who got up to bear his testimony,, Levi's doppleganger!  I look up from my arms where Andi is sleeping, as soon as I hear his voice,.. this young man who looks so much like my baby boy starts bearing his testimony...

*I am paraphrasing here* "I am so honored to have the priesthood, it is an awesome responsibility, I love how it makes me feel, and that I can help those people that are struggling right now,  and I know it's my responsibility as a priesthood holder to help those that need it, it is all our responsibility, to make sure those that are having a hard time, that they know they are loved by us and our Heavenly Father, and to help them come back...." He said so much more but the jist of it was that he knew th awesome responsibility he had, and he was prepared to do the work he was asked to do.

YOU GUYS,, I heard Levi saying it,,, HONESTLY HEARD THAT YOUNG MAN TALKING IN LEVI'S VOICE,  saying that he was ready to do what he knew he has been asked to do... that he was more than ready for this awesome responsibility, that had been asked of him,, and he was with me all the time to let me know I am loved, and not alone,, even though I am struggling right now. Oh the tears that fell, my heart nearly burst out of my chest.

Then the bishop got up, right as the meeting was about to close... and talked about General conference, how his family had been giving 6 tickets to attend this incredible meeting our church has bi annually,, the only problem was, there are 7 in his family, so he sent his wife and their kids into the meeting and he stayed outside... and the thought came to him,, He has much work to do to make sure he isn't left behind.. because this is how it will be if he isn't worthy,, what if,,, what if in the next life, his wife and kids get to go to the Celestial Kingdom and he is told he has to go to a different kingdom, what if he hasn't done everything he can to ensure his eternal family is truly eternal and always together throughout the millennium??  WHAT IF.....?

Ok Todd, got it,, brick to my head.  The spirit was tangible, What are the odds that I am in this ward, on this day and these things are being said?  I wasn't going to go,, I find it easier to stay home on sunday's and rest than go to my ward. But this wasn't my ward... I went so I could show support to my bestie, and her family and their ward ended up helping me more than they will every know.

Let me just say this... Even though I am having a hard time right now, and struggling, *honestly who isn't?*  I know that this is the true gospel,, I know my Father in Heaven loves me, and cries with me every single time tears escape my eyes, I know that MY Savior wants to smack me,, enfold me in His arms and tell me He's got this,, He has cried every single tear, felt every single piece of my heart shatter into a billion pieces, felt every string of anger, hatred, doubt, love, and forgiveness in my soul, and He would take it from me again if He could.  I know I will see my husband and son again, I know my family is eternal, and I know I have a lot of work to do, to ensure that I am with them again!  THIS I KNOW, and no one, not even the devil himself can take that knowledge from me.

I know.

10-1-2016

What an absolutely amazingly busy weekend it has been!!  My baby girl got married to the man who loves her ALMOST more than anyone in the world!  (I love her quite a bit!!)

Mum and Dad got here the Saturday before the wedding and I got to spent some time with them one on two, before things got hairy!!  They headed down to St George on Thursday, and Tom and I followed on Friday.  We got there in time to help put a few finishing touches up and run through the rehersal a couple times.  Jeff's dad bought hawaiian food for the rehersal dinner and it was DELICIOUS!!  Seriously amazing food!  Then we went back to Mum and Dad's hotel and soaked in the hot tub with Dad, Dean, Mandy and their girls.  Such a crazy hectic day, and so much fun!! Dean and Mandy came down from Fort MacMurray, spent a couple days in Vegas, then St George for the wedding, then Salt Lake area to see some friends, and now I think they are back in Vegas getting ready to fly home! I am so grateful they took time out of their busy schedule to make such a long trip down here for Kenzie and Jeff.

Saturday the girls got up early, Kenzie, Emily (Jake's wife), Mandy, Rach and Amy and I, and we went for pedicures and manicures.  GUYS!,,, the place we went was really amazing!! They opened an hour early just for us! And took no other clients until we were finished.. They were very accomodating, and, they gave us a discount for those of us who got both mani/pedi's!  Very impressed! and such a change from the place Mandy and I went in Lethbridge, who couldn't get us out of their salon fast enough!!!    After our pampering session, we headed back to the venue to set up the center pieces and linens and make sure everything looked as stunning as the Bride wanted it,.. then I dropped her off, and one of her bridesmaids, at her house, and headed back to the hotel to check on Mr Bronchitis... (Poor Tom, he was sooo sick and tried so very hard not to let it affect the festivities! that man is a trooper!!!)  I had him take me back to Mackenzie's so the girls could get ready.

I think it really hit me when I was helping her put on her dress.... she looked stunning.  It hit me then that my children are married,,, they are grown ups... adults.... living their own lives..... and they are doing a damn good job at it too!

My dad preformed the ceremony, he got licenced in Canada, and was able to pronounce Kenz and Jeff as Man and Wife.  Then the party began.... SO MUCH SUPPORT from all our friends and family!!!  We danced the night away!!!  We had friends and family,,, from Salt Lake, Henderson, Canada, Pittsburgh, Seriously!!! You guys are amazing!!!

After we sent the Bride and Groom off, the clean up began,, and man that went quick! HUGE thank you to everyone who stuck around and helped load up the truck!!  we were done in about 45 minutes!!!  Why is take down so much easier than putting up???

We met the next day at Kenz and Jeff's and had brunch and watched them open their gifts.  It was an amazing weekend.

Mum and Dad headed home to Cardston, Tom and I headed back home to SLC, and Dean and Mandy headed up towards SLC to see some friends for a few days.

As I am headed home I get a call from one of my nieces from magrath, "Hey auntie,, whacha doin'?"  I got a house guest for the night!! YAY!! I love it when my girls come to town and call me!!  We got to visit for a few, and catch up, then she headed back home the next morning.  (She had come down for General Conference)  THEN I get a call from her Mom,, "are you home?"  YAY!!!!!   They were down for conference too! And I got to visit with her and her hubs for a couple hours and get all caught up.  (this is one of my very best friends,, you know,, the one friend where you can go years without seeing each other and as soon as you meet up, it's like no time has passed,,, yep,, that's her!)

It has been a crazzy, insane, absolutely magical weekend.  Full of family, friends, love, hopes and dreams!!!  And I can't wait to watch my children fulfill their dreams!

<3 <3 <3 <3

waiting for the pictures from the wedding day still... <3